Wednesday, December 22, 2010

I'm spun around
Can't seem to hold
   on to you
You fall to the side

This romance I have with life
Is breaking me

I hold out my heart
Something for you
   to grab hold of
But you never open up
   to this chase

And I am left alone
   in this romance
I have with life

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Friday, July 9, 2010

FInding Me

I am
Everything the filter lets pass
Mama made it stronger
Father made it fast
No one taught me not
To listen
Only said I 'ought to
Now my mind is piled up
I can't sift through to who
I am
The person I would be
Before I was taught to see
I'm clearing out the skies
Till there is nothing
Of what some human left
Just me sitting
And being the way I ought to be
Not the way I was taught to be
Seeing the world
With no filter
Finding a way back to me

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Can't let Go

I can't let go,
To this place,
That's as close as home,

I can't let go,
Of the love I've made,
To the strange emptiness,

I can't let go,
Of lessons learned,
To a seemingly clean slate,

I can't let go,
Of laughter held in every spot,
To a closed stern line,

I let go,
To be swept into the unknown,
But my heart,
Is still firmly held,
Onto the memories....

Sunday, June 20, 2010

I'd kiss the sky blue
In hopes that you'd love me
Yet hope is not strong
To a man with no song
     So you leave me

And I wonder why I love
In a place so far gone
Where the shadows in the streets
     Fail to greet me

All I can do is travel within
Past where I've sinned
To stand on fair ground
This is where we meet
     and still you deceive me

I will never bow out
From loves inner fight
My hand remains open
My heart not yet closed
Here I wait
     In hopes you will look for me

Monday, May 17, 2010

Alive to Live

My friend
All that ails and weakens
I'll take and throw away
But first
Forgive your thoughts
That have invited such discourse
There is always time to heal
Is a right turn 
Taken Immediately
Advantages from bowing out
Are instant
What binds you and burdens 
Your life
Is a facade
Built by the one who can take it down
You, yet sometimes
A mime needs to guide 
To show you how to make
Unconscious moves from tangles and blunders of the mind
Into smooth aqueous strides of saturated existence
All of life is yours
I'll show you
Some will say this is a miracle
How you have become clean
But we'll know it was
Just me showing you how
To be purely alive
Alive to live

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Just You

I ride up and down
In these moments
These tracks built
By someone else
My past engineered them
Everyone invited
Has laid a little more

Sunset skies can't save me
Your light words won't help
Just hug me now
Kiss my cheek
Save me from my ride

Its helped that you are here
Even though I push you away
I don't enjoy the shove
The quiet silence
Of our thoughts or of our minds

I don't want silence so I can think
I want it so I will stop
Because in my silence
The ride loses momentum
So I can stand with you
With no floods of emotion
Just dry air

I will beg for the winds to blow
To take with it
All that takes me away from you


Today is a new day
The sun convinced me to say
Today will be a long day
My madness reminded me of today
But with you
I will not fear
To ride this day alone

Sunday, March 28, 2010

I dug a little deeper
Past the days you left behind
Tinkering with uncertainties
Of the pale and fluid sky
You saved a breath for me
I smiled a forward sigh
My heart knew of what I did need
But forgot to tell my mind
I will wait a little longer
Next to the showers and the cries
From a group of forgotten daisies
As we drown in your makeshift lies
I have known what you've always knew
What you tempted to leave behind
You would rather the past lead this dance
Than walk with me forward in time

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

A New Starting Line

When was the first time
I realized I could not fly?
When you told me so.

When was the first time
I was afraid to breathe?
When I realized
It could be done

When was the first time 
I realized mistakes became scars?
When you dug into my wounds
And made them deeper!

When was the first time
I felt that crying was a weakness?
Every time you yelled
To break me down
even smaller!

When was the first time
I saw the world as ugly?
When you pointed it out
And fed me your opinions!

Now I have realized that life
Is filled with firsts
You are no longer there
To make them my
Unless I choose them
to be.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Does the soul know of age
Does it beg to rest its head
Does it ache for flight 
From the stillness of my bed
Can it breathe in such confinement
Under the pressure of my will
Does it have the patience of thought
To know it can not rise until
It has taught me all it knows
Forced me to see all that is
Awakened me from the stillness of life
Showed me this is not mine nor either is it his
It has been brought to heart
As it ran through my mind
This life is not mine nor yours
It belongs to mother time

All that she has asked
Is for us to teach a few
And that living a selfless life
Will keep you from consuming you

Sunday, February 21, 2010

A Chance

I would bleed
If I were alive
If this pain
Was real
Yet bleeding may not be 
The release I need
So full
This body is full of regret
Regret for not living
The life my heart would suggest
SO, I stand
In this shell, dead to my world
It was me to blame
all this time
My weakness allowed them 
to point me the way
The way I should be
When all along
I needed to go nowhere
The answers were whispers inside
My meek voice 
feared gaining volume 
For if heard
it may be hushed
Now it is time to listen
and hope
That it has not been
eternally deafened by regret

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

I am buried in the cemetery of the living
Watching mournfully
As I lose out waiting
Waiting for a cause
To match these effects
I am dying in the
Cemetery of the living

He walks by with
A cold breath at his side
The flower has died
Wondering where I lie

Its hard for a heart to beat
When your surrounded by graves
Graves holding the living

That little girl passed
The one I once was and
She kicked the dirt of my grave
And smiled
Told me I had a choice
To rise and play
Or remain the same
Dying in the cemetery
Of the living

Coincidence stood by
Forcefully shedding a tear
But Shrugged his shoulders
He had shown up, pointing the way,
So many times

But I forgot how to listen
Slowly I sank into my grave
Where I am now living

Living so still in this shallow shell of mine
My soul rose up
Bored of my demise
And decided to join the life of the living
I am here empty where most
Lifeless souls do die
But I beg

Pull me up
Push me out
Into the world of the living
Because I would rather die living

Sunday, January 10, 2010

A Life Lived Terminally

Being love
Is Destroyed by allowance
Which begins with the struggle
As it is kept closed
In secret
Deceived and cold
When released
Reborn into battle
Now open
Yet bound by spite
Enters masked
Expected to avenge ghosts
Too weak
Weak from excessive
To its end
Lost Now
Led here by neglect
To the valley
Lost Love